Critics killed Tom Cruise’s awful ‘Digger’ — and clueless Hollywood is…
Depending on who you ask, critics such as myself are both completely irrelevant relics of the past like almanacs or sundials — Hollywood’s dream state of affairs — or snarling Godzillas who go round crushing poor, harmless films to dying with relish.
Well, it was clear which actuality was true last weekend.
After some scathing reviews, Tom Cruise’s “Digger” turned the flop heard ‘round the world. Tom tanked so exhausting, his wreck is on monitor to be one in every of the greatest flops of all time.
Much as I take pleasure in quoting myself, my favourite line really got here from my very affordable pal David Rooney of the Hollywood Reporter.
Tom Cruise’s “Digger” is a large flop. Warner Bros. Pictures through AP
“You watch in excruciating weariness as it disappears up its own ass and then realize to your dismay that there’s another eardrum-shattering hour left to endure,” wrote King Ghidorah, excuse me, David.
After the critiques dropped, “Digger”’s home box workplace projections dove off a cliff like Agent Ethan Hunt: $20 million (dire to start with) slipped to $15 million to its eventual unhappy, unhappy $8 million. Even fellow failure “Masters of the Universe” opened to $29 million.
Keep in thoughts that “Digger” — a message-heavy meta satire from the director of “Birdman” about an oil tycoon going through an environmental disaster — reportedly price between $135 million and $180 million to make. That’s a staggering price range for what it is. Less arthouse, more art-mansion.
More From Johnny Oleksinski
Even so, there is a palpable sense that Hollywood is shocked that critics would do this to Tom Cruise, who they have an inclination to play good with. They’re even more flabbergasted that our kvetching labored. Cruise needs to be critic-proof, they determine. To them, in a just world, every little thing needs to be.
These days Herculean efforts are taken to bypass the trustworthy opinions {of professional} reviewers.
The stars go movie cute movies making pizzas at the New York Times.
They sit down on completely satisfied podcasts like “Good Hang with Amy Poehler” and “Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend” and chat for an hour about their childhoods and first jobs.
“Digger” grossed just $8 million domestically on its opening weekend. Warner Bros. Pictures through AP
Most nauseatingly, my Page Six Hollywood colleague Tatiana Siegel reported that “Digger” had a particular trailer launch event to butter up influencers. Attendees obtained to pose for knowledgeable photograph with Cruise. Naturally those freeloaders all assume “Digger” is better than “The Godfather.”
See? Tom and Co. did every little thing proper to defang Manohla Dargis of the New York Times, Kyle Smith of the Wall Street Journal, Owen Gleiberman of Variety and David Erlich of IndieWire. And little outdated me, in fact.
Whoops. Didn’t work. Those 5 very different critics all hated it.
Now, Hollywood is manically scrambling to fix the catastrophe — kinda like Digger does! But that’s mission: unattainable.
The movie held an influencer event. Keizo Mori/UPI/Shutterstock
Warner Bros. launched a determined new clip seizing on the film’s divisiveness and imploring audiences to “decide for yourself.” The subtext being, “…since we weren’t able to decide for you.”
And Anne Hathaway went on the cinephile web site Letterboxd, and filed her first-ever review. Welcome to my profitable area, Anne! Soon you can also have a fourth-floor walkup with one cupboard.
“I loved this brilliant movie,” the film star wrote. “It’s worth making the time [to] see and decide for yourself what you make of it. For me? 10/10.”
See? There’s that patronizing phrase again. The notion of critics swaying public opinion is completely repulsive to these people.
Could Hathaway’s ardour come from the fact that she’ll star with Cruise next yr in “Days of Thunder 2”? I wouldn’t dare recommend such a factor.
Anne Hathaway reviewed “Digger” on Letterboxd. WireImage
And oddly Jane Fonda jumped in the fight. Anti-critic activism, maybe?
“The film allows us to witness another side of Tom Cruise’s courage,” Fonda wrote about him on Instagram like he’s Nelson Mandela. “It was a big, brave risk for him to take on this role and he was very good in it and very brave.”
Eh. Climbing the Burj Khalifa is courageous. Slapping on prosthetics and talking in a hokey Texas accent in a movie from the director of “The Revenant” is shameless Oscar searching.
Jane Fonda also spoke out in favor of the film. Getty Images
Cruise is every bit as clear about his starvation for a statuette (he’s never received an Academy Award) as Timothée Chalamet was during “Marty Supreme,” besides people really appreciated that film and it made cash.
Maybe he’ll handle a pity nomination as a gesture against the cranky critics — the business coming together to rebuke the horrible monsters who spend years seeing, pondering and analyzing all of their work. But he received’t win.
We’re not all dangerous, you understand.
Like we did with “Marty” in 2025, reviewers have helped loads of films that had been hardly certain issues this yr: “The Invite,” “Coyote vs. Acme,” “Project Hail Mary” and “Obsession,” among others.
But not Cruise’s broken-down automobile, which certain is struggling because of us. Don’t go digging critics’ graves just yet.
We offer you the latest trending subjects on C-lebrity. Get the best latest Entertainment news and content on our web site daily.